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Living A Values-Based Life
What is a values-based life? A values-based life is a self-capable life free of doubt or fear; a life that .....
Re-entering the dating scene is rather scary, but as a single woman, mom of four, I decided its time to play the field. After all, who wants to grow old single and alone? So, I consulted a few friends, an online dating service, and several single women I knew but ultimately most of them are satisfied with single. I decided to go straight to the source, the most interesting single person I know, who has interesting, challenging, and adventurous dates, knowing full well any advice I got would be direct, to the point, and daringly attractive to the kind of men Im interested in: adventurous, intelligent, professionals, with a family oriented bent.What is a values-based life? A values-based life is a self-capable life free of doubt or fear; a life that .....
After a few moments of dating discussion, revealing conversation about the state of men who date, and laughter over the possible prospects in my neighborhood, she offered up some incredibly good advice.
Ten tips:
1. Dont date. But, if you must
2. Play hard to get make your guy chase you.
3. Shock him with something daring a new haircut?
4. Let it be known that you like to play the field and are not interested in commitment.
5. If hes still around at this point: every couple of days call and ask what he is doing? Most will be busy the first couple of calls, but after the first calls, he will begin paying attention to you (small gifts, dinner, treats).
6. When he calls to ask what you are doing --- ALWAYS be busy, explain but dont tell him you will be alone.
7. Once youve reeled him in, on a nice girly date, compliment him a couple of times, but dont give him a BIG head.
8. Throughout the entire time youre allowing him to pursue you, fish for compliments. If he doesnt compliment you profusely and with abandon, he isnt worth your time. Dump him now.
9. Never call him, make him call you from this point on.
10. Ask the big question what do you want from me? See if he answers correctly, based on what you want at the moment.
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The challenge of dating as a full time mom who loves her children and desires to have an interesting personal life as well as a great family life is to find men who are interested in similar things, with like values. A challenge, not impossible, that I took seriously through a series of options that led to a few dates.Try Ireland for a golf holiday full of emerald green magic!
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A few tips for those of us who are a bit older:
1. Verify his intentions in the first few conversations. (If hes got different goals than you have, in the dating process, chances are he wont change them.)
2. Be sure you know your own boundaries and tell him.
3. Remember everyone has a life, all lives have baggage, and nobody wants to carry your load too.
4. Be yourself and be comfortable.
5. If hes not your type, cut him loose and let him fly. If youre not his type dont take it personally.
More than anything, have fun, dont get serious too fast, and pursue your own life interests NOT his.
Copyright 2005 Jan Verhoeff
Dating can be a great social event. Challenge yourself to meet new people, have a lot of fun, and go after what you want. You only have one life to live too. Visit my site at Work At Home Moms Co.