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The Corral (North St. Paul, Minnesota; 1952)




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I stood there against the fence, within the corral, sunbeams brushing across my face, yellow hay soaking into the drying up mud from the rain yesterday; listening to voices of the people around Dan, and Dan the horse; another horse I dont know his name, whom was by Dan, were restless or so it seemed; I was listening, watching and not thinking about anything at all even when I heard Dan stomping in the mud like a mad mule, I stood there with my eyes closed for a moment I think they were closed, I seemed to be drifting a bit, I was scared a ting, he was hissing People trying to hold him, someone trying to mount him, kids and people all about; hes being resistant. Now hes kicking, I opened my eyes
Are you hurt (said a voice)?

Tears pouring down my face

I didnt make a sound

Tears pouring down my face

I felt a kick into my ribs

Dan must have kicked me, hard to breathe

I felt a kick, a kick, a kickyes a kick

I didnt think Dan would have

Janet held me close to her

Hes just five-year old, Dan

Whats the matter with you!

She grabbed his harness

Slapped his face

Quiet now quiet down

I know Dan wouldnt I know that

She held onto me, I wanted to cry

I wanted to say let me go

Dan

She held him back, pushed his face

Grabbed me from under his legs

Howd I get there?

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I was there

Her face was saying, he could

He could strike out again

Her face was saying that

She took my hand and rubbed it

Against his neck

My ribs hurt

Then she noticed a bee sting

She said so,

Look at the bee sting

Then she noticed me, she smiled

Along the rim of the saddle

Almost between the saddle

My ribs hurt

She noticed that now

There was the a dead bee

He must had hit him with his tail

Tried to kill the bee, jumping

Now say his name

She told me

My little heart started beating fast

Accelerating

Say it again

I said it three times

I heard a bird

It seemed to mellow me out

I wanted to cry, I sniffled

And tears came out of my eyes

My head seemed numb

Up, out of aof a; we walked

To the house

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(The boarding farm, l952 it was)

That evening in my bunk bed, my blood surged steadily against my ribs
(I can feel it now as I write this).

I kept on thinking for a long time: why did Dan kick me, he didnt see me I think; I think hes always been my friend. I feed him almost every day. Thats what I said to myself. I now could hear Janet and the other kids downstairs,

Quiet, she said to the kidsI was thought to be sleeping.

I tried to see my bruised ribs, but my neck hurt trying to bend it along with my twisting over to see the backside of the upper part of the rib area.

Has it stopped? Janet asked.

She startled me in the dark, I was thinking of Dan, and here she came into the bedroom; I jumped, and my ribs hurt when I jumped.

Yes, it almost stopped, I think. So I said.

She put a cool rag on it, against it, told me to hold it

Damn, if it will not leave a big burse, your mother will see it and I got a lot of explaining to do.

I heard a phone ring downstairs, Janet turned to hear if it was for her, the voice said, and Kiddy Corner shes busy right now, can she call you back? then I heard the phone receiver heavily put back into place.

My face felt cold, in the warm summer night, it was dark in the bedroom. I got thinking about how Id feed Dan tomorrow, if Janet let me.

Later on that night Janet come back up stairs, to my bedroom with a piece of beef and put it against my swollen rib side, tied it kind of with some gauze-tape.

Youll need this for tonight, beef will take the swelling down, itll help, she said, with an unsure smile on her face now. I wanted to feed Dan tomorrow, I wanted to ask her if I could, I mean, I normally I could, did this stop things now.

I think my mothers coming tomorrow, I said to myself, its going to be the weekend, and she comes to pick me and Mike up on the weekends, after work from Swifts (the meat packing planet in South St. Paul). Tomorrow is not too far off. Ill feed Dan and mom will be here about 5:30 PM, and shell take us to stay at Grandpas; were going to move in there for good, soon. I think Ive been here for a very long time.

I was there for three and a half years, on the boarding farm, and just after I opened up my eyes after Janet went downstairs, I opened up the curtain to see the back area of the farm, where Dan slept. When they told me to stand by the fence pole, and everyone was busy trying to steady Dan, I must had walked to him, no one seeing me, out to him, wanting to ride him, we were all going to ride him, not sure when my turn was, but that is when he kicked meit was twilight now, I feel fine, I told myself, looking out the window; the gable not allowing me to see right above the house, a more extended view. The cow in the neighbors pasture was still out, I wonder when hell have to go to sleep? I asked myself.

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